So, I got my braces off today. I wouldn't have been looking forward to it as much if I'd known how painful the removal process would be. They snap the brackets off of one's teeth by torqueing them until they break free. Seriously. Some came off easily, and others were several seconds of "OW OW OW OHMIGOD I'M NOTSUREICANTAKETHISANYMORE!!SNAP!!" Then there was the Grinding of the Adhesive From My Teeth. By the time all that was over, the mouthful of alginate to mold my retainers seemed tame.
I'd made myself a lunch, but my mouth ached far too much to chew it. Fortunately, I'm the sort of person who would have a spare bottle of baby food in my desk drawer for just such an emergency, so I didn’t go hungry.
Anyway, here's what I look like now: