Drillbit Taylor – I loathe bullying. So you'd think a story about three kids who hire a bodyguard to protect them from bullies would hold my interest. Not so much. Perhaps I might have started enjoying this film if I forced myself to watch it without fast-forwarding, but it just didn't seem worth the effort.
Zombie Strippers – You know how annoying it is to watch a movie about strippers, and there's no actual stripping? The best that I can say about this movie is that there is a lot of stripping. The story is like, government virus, something something, strippers, something, zombie killing. I was annoyed that I grew bored with a movie that had so much nudity it in.
Eagle Eye – I hate movies where some someone can "hack into" and control any electronic system instantly. Collect data from every database about the protagonist? Done! Change traffic lights? Sure! Mess with the cash register at the corner market? Easy! Maybe other people aren't so bothered by it, but I vote against this movie, merely based on what it claims computers can do.
A Dirty Shame – Of all the movies reviewed today, this is the one that I'd consider going on about most. Not because I liked it best. Probably because one might mistake this for a meaningful dialog about opposing viewpoints on sexuality, but it's much too goofy for that. The way fans rave about John Waters movies, I feel I should like them more than I do.
Sucker Punch – Eww. Ick. Multilayered and visually evocative, yet grim and unrelenting. It's like a single-story issue of "Heavy Metal," with short skirts in place of nudity. Can't really recommend it, unless you're feeling just too happy, and need something to bring you down.
Gran Torino – The best movie out of today's reviews: It really earns the praise it received. Clint Eastwood plays a racist curmudgeon who gets to know his Hmong neighbors after his wife passes away. Even the slow scenes were compelling enough to watch all the way through (why can't more movies be like that?).
Okay, now to go be more productive...